Don't Worry, Be Happy
A positive mindset can help change your view of any
situation
Thanks to a recent bestseller, the power of
positive thinking is no longer a secret. Some experts suggest that
the way we look at a situation- whether it's fear of catching the
cold going around or disappointment about getting passed over for a
promotion-will determine how quickly we can overcome it.
Licensed psychologist Marci Fox, Ph.D., coauthor of the book
Think Confident, Be Confident (Perigee, 2009), offers up these five
ways to give negative thinking the boot:
Doubts cannot be trusted. Imagine you're at a
party, says Fox, and you're intimidated by the crowd. "You start to
have thoughts like, 'I don't measure up to these people.' So you
shrink into the background. Instead, look at the facts. "Say to
yourself, 'What evidence do I have that this is true? None. I was
invited to this party.'" Once you recognize the thought isn't true,
you can throw it out.
You are the whole package. Make a list of your
strong physical assets, your positive personality traits, your
skills and experience. Then, says Fox, you'll have confidence to
come prepared to any situation.
Gosh darn it, you deserve it. It may sound
cheesy, but you matter, too. If your mind is overwhelmed with a
must-do list the length of your arm, it might be time to make a
want-to-do list. "Be able to say, 'I deserve this,'" says Fox, who
recommends mind-quieting things such as preparing your favorite
meal, reading a magazine, getting a massage or planning your next
vacation.
Give yourself some credit. While we're on the
topic of to-do lists, Fox recommends making a daily credit list.
"Name five things you were able to accomplish for the day," she
says. It'll end the day on a high-note instead of a defeated
one.
It's not all about you. So you're on your way
to a cheery new outlook. Except then, your best friend snaps at you
and you nose-dive into self-doubt. It's all about how you perceive
it, says Fox. "You can't assume that he or she is mad at you. Other
people are going through other things. You're not responsible for
making them happy."
-By Amanda Myers